I recently came across this question in one of my Facebook groups. “I don’t feel attached to my new horse…why?” It was after the girl had had to put down her old horse and she had gotten a new one and he was perfect for her in every way. But she didn’t feel the same click with the new horse and was worried something was wrong.
It’s 100% normal.
When I first got Jim, it wasn’t like an immediate love at first sight, we are bonded at the hip feeling. I was still mending my wounds a bit and trying to figure things out. Jim – like the horse for the other girl – was perfect for me. He had the right attitude, build, potential that I needed. He was sensitive and sweet and would take care of me. But those first few months took work. Over time, going to see him multiple times a week at the barn, grooming him, riding him, pampering him, our relationship began to grow. It’s now over a year and a half later and we have that attached at the hip, trusting relationship. Now he nickers at me when he sees me and I know all of his quirks and habits and things that make him Jim.
It’s ok when you’re going through a transition, no matter if you had to sell your old horse or put them down or it was the ending of a lease. All of us equestrians have been through this before. It’s not an easy feeling and it can be a hard time. But don’t beat yourself up when you don’t immediately have that relationship with your new equine. Give it time to develop. Although the place in your heart for your old horse will never go away, you’ll find a new spot just for your new partner.
While browsing through the site the other day, I realized it’s been awhile since I gave an update on life with my husband and Jim. I have to say things have been going well.
Recently I discovered a new fun thing to do: virtual dressage shows. I compete through Dressage Show Online. They post open shows and you video your ride and enter it. They have USEF and WDAA carded judges who then view the video, score it and place you. Jim and I recently took High Point Adult Amateur Western Dressage in this year’s August Championship show! We won both of our classes in WDAA Intro 3 AA and WDAA Intro 4 AA.
This year, Jim, my husband and I have been taking a step back from showing at every open show. On a tight budget (yup, adulting is terrible sometimes), we have been focusing on certain shows – particularly my dressage shows. Luckily my husband isn’t as competitive as I am and although he did a few traditional dressage tests, he isn’t really pushing to do many more. He would rather jump – I say he’s crazy.
Our show year is quickly coming to a close. With one schooling show and one dressage show left to compete in, my scores for AWSSR year-end awards are already in. I’m a bit sad to see this year end, but I am very happy with how far Jim and I have come.
Settling into western dressage as our discipline was the best decision I have made. Both my husband and I are back to working on Jim’s canter. (He gets a bit excited.) He’s very responsive and he has been working through his body and balancing much better than he did this time last year.
This year has definitely called for my husband and my teamwork to shine through as a married couple. We have made sacrifices because of budget reasons and we have come to those decisions together. One of the benefits of both being riders is that when tough decisions come up, we can make informed decisions. It’s not just “Your horse costs too much. It’s “OUR horse is costing us a lot!” I am thankful every day that I have a significant other who understands how important Jim is in my life and can work things out.
But now, it’s time to break out our fall and winter muck boots, get ready for weekend chores in the cold and start bundling Jim up in his wardrobe. Goodbye summer and hello fall!
Even when you board your horse, it can get lonely. Whether you board with one other person, 20 other people, or have your horse in your backyard, it is good to find a community to get involved with. As much as we love our alone time with our equines, it’s good to reach out and find other like-minded individuals to socialize with. There are a number of ways to get involved, even if you don’t own your own horse.
Do you show? Is your horse registered? There are a number of breed associations that you can become a part of. AQHA, APHA, American Warmblood Society and Sporthorse Registry, the Arabian circuit, Morgans, the list goes on and on. There’s a group for everyone and at all levels of competition. Many of the organizations welcome their members to get involved with the regional club – as a board member or a show volunteer, to help with social media or sponsors. All you have to do is call them up or shoot them an email. Go on their national websites and locate your local regional club and subsection of the national organization. You’ll find people all over the world just waiting to welcome you with open arms.
Is the open circuit more your style? Do you find yourself going to all barrel racing shows or do you do cowboy mounted shooting? Or are you just looking for an organization that welcomes everyone? They’re out there! Make a post on Facebook or ask around at your local tack shop. You’ll find a group to get involved in there.
Would you rather be in the woods or at the beach with your horse? All over the nation there are trail riding associations and clubs to join. These clubs plan meet ups and host big trail rides and camping sites so you can all enjoy the outdoors and your horses in a relaxed, fun manner. They can also teach you some neat tricks of the trail about what to pack and be prepared for!
Do you not have a horse? Your local horse rescues are always looking for volunteers. Or maybe you do own your own but have some free time? Almost all rescues have open barn hours or days where they accept volunteers. There’s always hay to be brought in, a barn to be painted, a horse groomed or a fence to mend. These horses and organizations appreciate any time – however short or long – you can provide!
Do you enjoy the show or expo atmosphere, but don’t know how to get involved? Many shows or expos accept volunteers. It’s a great way to meet people and lend a hand! Equine Affaire is coming up in Massachusetts in November and they’re always looking for volunteers! And for a bonus, you get into the expo for free!
No matter what way you get involved, it’s so good for your horse and for your soul to get out and about. Meet other equestrians that love horses just as much as you do. You won’t regret it!
Recently while cinching Jim up in his western saddle, I looked at him and wondered if there was a better cinch for him than just the straight cinch. After speaking with my trainer, we came across the Total Saddle Fit Shoulder Relief cinch. Available in synthetic or leather and then a felt, neoprene or fleece liner, I chose a black leather cinch with white fleece for Jim. Then I eagerly awaited the mail.
The cinch arrived in good time and unboxing it, I was surprised with a hat that had come along with it! Pretty cool plus! The fleece is very soft and the leather is supply and smells great. It has a roller buckle on one end and comes with a good diagram of how to use it.
I rode Jim in it the next day and he loved it! After walking him around a bit, it fell right in place. He definitely enjoys having the fleece on his skin instead of neoprene rubbing. It also looks sharp. I absolutely love the shape of this cinch and Jim enjoys it too! He rode very nicely in it and it frees up his elbows and shoulder very well.
The only downside is a small negative to the fleece. I rode in an 85 degree + day in the northeast. It was very humid and Jim had sweat a lot. After riding, I made sure to rest the cinch upside down off from the saddle to dry out the fleece since it did get quite wet. However, Total Saddle Fit does sell replacement liners so if I ever want to switch out the fleece, I can without losing the cinch! That is a nice feature I’m sure I’ll use sometime in the future.
Total Saddle Fit has these cinches for western, dressage and English saddles. The two English versions are even sold at Dover Saddlery. It was a bit expensive ($130 without the fleece, $169 with the fleece), but the quality is there and I’ve already recommended it to a number of friends! I can’t wait to log some more miles in this cinch.
(Disclaimer: I purchased this cinch with my own funds.)
Jim eats better than I do. He has a personal nutritionist. He has all of his meals carefully planned. He gets an ideal amount of everything he needs to be the successful athlete he is. While I sit and just try to make a healthy recipe out of a book, he is getting the most perfect feed for his type, weight and exercise. What we feed our horses matters. They are athletes and they need the dietary support to perform how we want them to.
It’s sometimes easy as a horse owner to sit back and let others make decisions for you. Your horse may be fairly easy to feed. He or she may get fat on air. But when it comes to becoming an educated owner who likes to learn and be involved, it’s important to dive right in and understand WHY your horse is fed what he is.
I’m very fortunate to have a trainer who doubles as a nutritionist for the farm. She has spent a lot of time with me sitting down and discussing supplements and how best to tailor Jim’s diet to his workload and condition.
My favorite example is when it came to picking a new hoof supplement. Before I had Jim on the DAC Bloom and Oil for his coat and hooves. The products are fabulous together. However Jim started gaining fat pockets. He had tipped the side of the scale from muscle and healthy weight to getting fat and we wanted to nip it in the bud.
But not all hoof supplements are created equal and this is where equine nutrition and a knowledge in it become important.
For example, every supplement varies in the vitamins and amount of vitamins. They have to, otherwise they would all be the same product. Some have different fillers. Some are one ingredient. Some deliver vitamins by way of fat.
Hoof supplements are a perfect example of variation. They vary anywhere from 10mg of biotin in a 1oz scoop to 50mg or more. Some include copper, zinc and methionine while others are strictly biotin. It’s important as you begin to travel through the pages upon pages of supplements to have a trusted guide at your side. What sounds like Greek to you will be easily understood by someone with more experience.
But learn. Pay attention to why a supplement is better than another supplement for your horse. For Jim, he couldn’t have anything with a high fat content or something that delivered the biotin via fat. That was the reason he could not be on the Bloom anymore. But the methionine helps a horse’s body process biotin so it’s a good thing to have in a supplement.
We went through dozens. It took over an hour going through supplements to decide on one to try. And yes, I said try because at the end of the day, we may not be happy with it. Your horse’s diet – yours as well – is fluid. It always has to be assessed and tailored.
At some point, sit down with your trainer or someone – not a feed store rep – to analyze what you feed. Determine what holes exist in the feeding program and ask questions. Be more involved. At the end of the day, your horse will thank you.
I’m going to say something that will make everyone gasp…
Treats aren’t the only way you can show your horse love and appreciation.
I touched on some of these in my blog about my post-show routine, but I think it’s an important fact to get across. You don’t have to constantly feed your horse to make them happy.
With the issues of obesity in horses, many people don’t look into what they’re feeding as treats. Some treats are so laden with sugars, artificial flavors or fillers that it’s like giving your horse a McDonald’s milkshake every day.
And it’s not just sugar-filled treats. Apples have a historically higher sugar content than carrots do. Better yet – rainbow organic carrots have an even lower sugar content.
How many treats – even the little peppermints from restaurants that you nabbed on the way out – do you give a day? One or two? Or five to 10? It may seem incidental, but it’s not. It adds up in your horse’s overall health.
Along with finding low or no sugar treats and watching out for artificial flavors and starches, your horse would just as much appreciate a good liniment rub. Or a massage with a favorite curry comb. I have one of the curry combs with the rolling magnets on one side. Jim absolutely loves it!
Instead of filling up a treat ball or hanging a Lick-It in the stall, how about a few special moments of hand grazing? Or a nice shampoo and conditioning – including mane and tail – that would make your horse feel better.
Even a long scratch on the withers where it’s particularly itchy for horses is sometimes most satisfying for them than a treat. I’m not saying to never give treats – I think Jim would murder me – but feed within reason. One or two after a good work where he or she earned them is better than a huge handful for just existing. Also pay attention to what you’re feeding. I’ve been personally feeding Giddyap Girl treats that are lower in sugar and also include some good probiotics.
Your horse and his body condition score will thank you.
Recently @equine.rampaige on Instagram drew Jim and I. It was after our last Western Dressage show and I really wanted a drawing that showcased his beauty. She surpassed any expectation I had! Along with shedding a few pounds from me (Thank you!!), she captured Jim perfectly. I didn’t have to give her much direction either, she just knew. All of the comments on her Instagram were about being so happy a western dressage rider had been drawn! I’ll be finding a special spot for this on the blog soon!
After a busy day at a show, your horse is tired, you’re tired. Everything is a mess. You have your tack still in the trailer. Your show bag is full of hay from where your horse dripped pieces from his hay bag into it. Your show numbers are still attached to a bridle or a show jacket. Pretty much, it’s utter chaos.
We spend so much time before the show to get ready and so much energy AT the show that no one feels like cleaning up afterward. It takes enough of your energy to make sure both horse and items get back to the barn OK that nothing else matters.
This past Sunday, my husband and I packed up our stuff and Jim and went off to a dressage show. Afterward I ran off to a late night at work and Thomas went home to crash after not sleeping. My schedule for the next morning? Post show routine.
Getting to the barn, I checked on Jim first. He was exhausted. The night before a thunderstorm had rolled through and I swear he didn’t get any sleep. Spa day! Perfect for post show days.
But before I could do anything with him, I had to unpack the trailer. Not only is promptly unpacking the trailer important, but it’s respectful to your fellow barn mates and trainer. They will need that trailer for another show – one you may not be going to – and it’s only polite to get all of your stuff out so when it comes time, others can put their stuff in. Otherwise it would become one big mess and no one would be able to find anything!
I have a system for trailer unpacking. Doing multiple trips back and forth, I work on getting everything from the trailer to my tack trunk. I don’t care where it goes at this point, just the act of getting all of the items in one spot helps! Then it’s hanging up the saddles, pads and bridles and putting brushes, lunge equipment and other things away. Show numbers get immediately put in the show bag for future shows since many of them make you reuse your number for the season!
Once everything is away, I could focus on Jim. Pampering days are some of my favorite. I break out all of my brushes – curry comb, hard brush, soft brush, flicker brush, face curry comb, face brush, mane and tail comb, hoof pick – and I go at it. Polish up with some hoof dressing, rebraid his tail and put it up in his Tail Boot.
Then I wrapped him up in his Back on Track mesh sheet. My next BOT purchase needs to be the quick wraps. That would make for some extra special spa days! Putting Jim away, the biggest thank you was watching him lay down and fall asleep – so peaceful and so comfortable. Spa days are my way to say thank you to him – thanks for performing your best and being my partner.
Spring has come to New England and with it, we prepare for the biggest battle we equestrians face: flies.
Just last week, I spotted my first bee of 2019. Gnats are beginning to beat their wings. My husband is finding baby spiders in his car. We must be ready.
Last week, I purchased my first few bottles of fly spray for Jim. Tucking one in my tack trunk, I hung the other on his stall for easy use and for turnout. (I have a great bottle holder that hangs on my blanket bar that comes in handy!) My barn owner looked at me as if I was crazy; being so prepared. But the fact of the matter is, it’s not a bad thing to be prepared for.
Some horses are very sensitive to bug bites. Although not overly reactive, Jim can be prone to hives from some bites and he is not a fan of bugs in his face or ears while riding. My secret weapon when it comes to fly spray is the Pyranha products. I especially like their aerosol for good coverage that lasts and really works. It goes for anywhere from $16-22 a bottle and does not make your horse’s coat too slick before a ride.
When it comes to riding, Jim often sports a fly mask or a fly bonnet. This year, my husband and I got new LeMieux sets in plum and midnight. I can’t wait to try them out! I am shopping for a new fly mask this year. I’ve had my current one for almost 2 years and it’s time to change it up. I did like my old one though which was the Absorbine Ultrashield.
For fly sheets, you can’t beat the quality of Schneider’s. I own both their Mosquito Mesh sheet with a neck and their Interlock Mesh sheet. The interlock is slightly heavier of a material, but has great UV protection which is wonderful when you have a black horse and don’t want him to bleach! The mosquito mesh is lighter and really good for those especially hot summer days.
The next thing on my checklist? Start throwing winter blankets into the wash and take my fly sheets out of storage. I was smart and put them away clean so they’ll be all set to break out and use this year. I like to slowly rotate my winter blankets out of use as the weather warms up. The heavyweights are already in the wash and the mediumweights will be going soon. Eventually his turnout sheets will hit the wash too, but with the amount of mud he enjoys kicking up while playing – it won’t be for awhile.
It’s the end of March and before you know it, those flies will be buzzing around our heads and in our hair once again. Don’t let them catch you off guard!
As a sport, we are surrounded by judging. We are judged for how we look. We are judged for how our horses look. We are judged for how we ride. But in the midst of all of that judging, we should be doing more supporting.
Statistics around rates of depression, anxiety and suicide are terrifying. It’s almost impossible to find someone that hasn’t been affected in some way by an issue with mental health. You can’t see depression from how someone is dressed. You don’t know that they’ve considered suicide from how successful or unsuccessful their ride was. You have no idea if they’re going through an anxiety attack by the brand of their show jacket.
No, you can’t “solve” them. One interaction may not lift all of their thoughts of suicide out of their mind. One saying won’t cure them of depression. But a kind word can soothe.
We as equestrians don’t do enough cheering. We are so focused on how we did that we don’t always look to the other girl in the lineup and say you did a good job. We don’t often help one another in the warm up arena as everyone is trying to navigate a ring of chaos. We don’t always try and lift each other up so everyone can do well and feel accomplished.
Yes, our sport may be about judging, but we compete to also have fun. It isn’t particularly fun to come in last every class or feel utterly defeated by a ride. What is fun, though, is being told by another competitor that they liked your shirt or that your pivot turn in a showmanship class rocked. Maybe you had a fantastic rein back in the line up. Or maybe your horse was extra shiny that day. Little comments count.
So I challenge you, fellow equestrians, just as I challenge myself. Make someone smile. Help another with their 20m dressage circle or just tell them you love their horse. Instead of just saying “maybe next time,” tell them something positive. Lift them up. Although you can’t solve everyone’s mental health issues, maybe just that kind comment keeps it at bay for a moment. It might give someone just that little bit of relief and positivity that they need to hear. You can make a difference.